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Perfect balance and harmony would be a pretty boring state. Think about it - no disagreement, no conflicts or problems, just a heavenly state of bliss all the time. It is the introduction of the unknown, the un-achieved, the challenge of new problems that keep life interesting. With any new endeavor will come a new conflict of some proportion. If it could be achieved effortlessly, would you have any interest in achieving it? More often than not, the new ideas, goals and people that come into your life are not under your absolute control. They have their own energies, their own intentions and directions - and some of these will inevitably conflict with yours! If you are alive today and live on planet earth, you are going to experience conflict (= problems = disharmony). This does not mean you cannot achieve balance and harmony in your life. It means you need to choose your conflicts.
Broaden your comfort zone
Balance is defined as equanimity, satisfactory distribution of elements, comfort, stability, a calm emotional state. Have you ever met someone who must have everything their own way or they are in a state of turmoil? This is an extreme whereby the person cannot achieve comfort because they are not open to others' ideas and energies. The other extreme is a person who fears his own goals and goes along with everyone else in an attempt to avoid conflict. Both have narrow comfort zones. They are unhappy, and unbalanced. Creating harmony and balance in your life is a very personal matter. It requires tailoring your problems (conflicts, disharmonies) to your particular comfort zone. A first step in achieving balance is to know your own goals and intentions…and then broaden those a bit to achieve harmony.
Distributing your energy
For example, let's imagine Sally is unhappy in her love life. She feels all the good men are taken, and there just doesn't seem to be the ideal man out there for her. She goes out on lots of first dates, but doesn't want to waste time on a second date once she's determined that he's not The One. Because having a problem with her love life is what she uses to keep her life interesting, she feeds lots of energy into it and her love life is in a constant state of conflict. Sally needs to redistribute some of her energy towards a new problem or challenge. If Sally suddenly found out that she had a terrible disease that required immediate medical attention, you can be sure that she would no longer be miserable about her love life. This of course, would be a problem in the wrong direction. She would do better to consider her personal goals in another part of life - perhaps she once had a goal to learn how to play piano. The energy that she puts into learning something new will balance her distribution of energy and give her some new problems (finding time to practice, understanding how to read notes, getting along with her teacher, etc.) that are more tailored to her personal comfort zone. Once she has achieved this balance, she can now broaden her goals a bit to include giving a concert where she will undoubtedly meet the man of her dreams and live happily ever after!
(Stranger things have happened!) Actually, by now she would be more tolerant of others' imperfections (having had to deal with some of her own imperfections in meeting a new challenge) and have a wider comfort zone. In other words, now she can find a man whose faults she can comfortably live with - after all, it is conquering new problems that keeps life interesting! So you see, enjoying balance and harmony does not mean eliminating all your problems. It means the ability to distribute your energy appropriately to the inevitable conflicts of life. Harmony ensues when this is done in proportions that fit within your personal comfort zone, which will also broaden as you take on new problems of your own making.
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